BOOKS: The Rules for Cats

From ANIMAL PEOPLE, May 1997:

The Rules for Cats
by Bradford Telford and Michael Cader, illustrated by Peter Spacek
Cader Books (c/o Dutton Signet, 375 Hudson St., New York, NY 10014), 1997.
94 pages, hardback, $11.95.

Those of us not actively engaged in
the mating game may have overlooked T h e
Rules, a best-selling reminder of the hoary old
rules women follow to set themselves up as a
slave/enslaver of a man, through careful
adherance to such fits-all “rules” as never telephoning
him, not revealing interest, etc.

Bradfor Telford and Michael Cader
send up those Rules with a feline guide to the
entrapment of owners by furry love-slave cats
who keep their cool, do not demean themselves
with untimely displays of affection,
carefully calculate effect, and are not above a
bit of manipulation. Their subtitle is “4,000-
year-old Secrets for Controlling Your Owner.”
Hide your copy and maintain composure
should you fall, break a leg, and your
cat try rule 3-C on you: “Roll your eyes, flex
your nictating membrane, and resume your
nap on your owner’s warm, immobilized
chest.”